Before I get to the happenings in Athens, I have a couple of things to mention.
First, in the TMI category, I woke up to severe ass pain. My cheeks had chafed from the camel ride, and I had several scrapes and skin scraped off from the camel ride. Ugh. It hurt to sit down, so I wasn't thrilled about getting on a plane to Athens (at least the flight was a relatively short one at just under 2 hours). Now that I have the benefit of hindsight, I can let you know that it took 4 days for my cheeks to completely heal. Yikes!
Ok...The second point is to tell you about the disaster that is Olympic Airlines -- perhaps the most ghetto "large" airline I have ever used ("Big Sky" was the most ghetto I've ever used -- I took this "airline" to Arkansas years ago -- but that was a very, very small airline).
There were only two airlines that flew directly to Athens from Cairo: Egypt Air and Olympic Airlines. Olympic was running about half the price of Egypt Air, so naturally, I selected the less expensive option.
On two consecutive days, I tried booking a reservation through Olympic Airlines's website, but each time I tried, my credit cards were denied. I figured that there might have been a problem with me traveling and using my cards, so I asked a few other people stateside to give it a go. Nope -- no luck, there, either. Ok, I tried the website's "Contact Us" section and found an email address for the Cairo office. I shot an email off to the office, and almost instantly got a "failed delivery" message. Ugh. I had a phone number for the Cairo office and asked Ashraf if I could use his phone. He obliged and I dialed...Line not working (of course). Ugh.
After my experience in Saigon, I knew that not all airlines have ticket offices at every airport, so I was concerned about trying to buy a ticket directly at the Cairo airport -- especially since the office seemed to be closed.
Just in case, I formulated a Plan B for which I prepared to travel to either Rome or head to Budapest early. Since I couldn't get a hold of Olympic, the only choice for Plan A was to go to the airport and give "buying a ticket at the airport" a try.
Ashraf's driver (the same van and guy who had picked me up from the airport originally) took me to the airport and ushered me towards the security checkpoint. The Cairo airport was structured so that flight passengers had to go through security before even entering the airport to check-in for the flight (I had not previosly experienced this setup). Naturally, that created a giant cluster f$ck right in front of the airport. The van driver told me to go through this area even though I protested by saying, "I don't have a ticket yet -- I need to get a ticket!" He kept insisting that I go through this area. It didn't feel right, but I approached the security guard.
In broken English, the guard asked me for my ticket. I told him that I didn't have one. He then grabbed a list printed on old dot-matrix computer paper, pointed to it, and angrily said, "Name?" Of course, the security guard manned the only entrance to the check-in counters at the airport, so there were at least 50 people behind me trying to push their way through. The guard multi-tasked: he dealt with me while turning back to the crowd and physically held them back. In other words, it was a giant mess. I told him again, "Not on list; no ticket! Where buy ticket?" He got pissed, grabbed my 36 pound bag off the conveyer belt, swung it towards me and motioned for me to leave. Aaaagh!!
I pressed through the gauntlet of incoming travelers and met the van driver who gave me a quizzical look. "I don't have a ticket!" I snapped at him (probably unfairly, but I was annoyed). "I need a ticket!" "Oh, ticket!" he said and led me to another area of the airport about 50 yards away. We headed towards the Olympic Air counter, which, surprise, surprise, was...
closed...
UUUUGGGGHHHH!!
However, there was a sign on the door. The sign stated that tickets could be purchased on the opposite side of the airport at the SkyMall where Olympic had their "Management Offices." Ok -- on to something now. Time wasn't really an issue -- I had allowed enough time to execute Plan B if necessary, and all of the flights from Plan B were much earlier than my Olympic Airlines flight, so I wasn't in danger of missing the Athens flight.
We hiked over to the SkyMall (and somehow picked up another older Egyptian man that was in the same quandary as me). About 20 minutes later, we arrived at the Olympic Management Office.
A very nice Greek woman greeted me and I told her that I would like to buy a ticket to Athens. She told me that I needed to go back to the office from which I came because that was the only place to buy tickets. AAAARRRGGGHHHH!!! I told her that I just came from that office and it was locked. She gave me an odd look and picked up the phone. After making a few calls, she told me to go to the Egyptian Air office instead.
The Three Musketeers (the van driver, the new guy, and me) all walked the 20 minutes to get back over to the original area. Next to the Olympic Airlines ticket office was an Egyptian Air office. I walked in and a 24 year old Egyptian guy wearing a suit and shortly cropped hair greeted me. He told me to follow him. The three of us followed him to the Olympic Airlines office, which he opened using a key. I sat down and he created a "ticket" for me. Of course, cash was the only payment, and I wasn't sure I had it in Egyptian Pounds (it was $208). I left to use the ATM machine until I counted my money and realized I already had enough [face palm].
I returned to the office, gave the guy my money, and he printed off the most ridiculous looking ticket. It was a piece of paper with the flight details and my name; that's it. No watermark, no special paper, nothing. OMG would this be easy to forge...Seriously ghetto.
With my "ticket" in hand, I headed back to the secured airport entrance. The original security guard still worked the door and he instantly recognized me. I smiled and showed him the ticket. He actually high-fived me, laughed really hard, pointed at his chest and said, "I win." This time, he grabbed my bag off the conveyor belt and handed it to me with his smile still beaming.
I thanked him and as I turned, a random Egyptian grabbed my bag, threw it on a shopping cart looking contraption and wheeled my bag exactly 9 feet to the Olympic Airlines check-in desk. He then gave me puppy eyes and stated plainly, "Tip?" After all I had dealt with at that point, I was really tempted to punch him in the face -- 9 feet?! and you want a stinkin' tip. I told him no and grabbed my bag from him.
At the counter, I presented my "ticket." Miraculously, the woman behind the desk took it, and started processing my boarding pass. Wait...This can't be that easy...
She tried once...twice...three times...I told her that I just bought the ticket. She nodded and turned to another guy and said something in Greek. He put his hands up in a "I don't know what the f$ck to do either," expression and turned to yet another person, and said something in Greek. The third person was clueless as well, and motioned to a FOURTH person. UUUGGGGHHH!!!
The FOURTH person came over to me and asked me about the "ticket." I told him I had just bought it and described the guy from whom I had purchased the ticket. This FOURTH person made a phone call and told me to wait (luckily, not a single other soul came to check-in while I waited through this ordeal).
About 7 minutes later, the guy who sold me the ticket showed up. He talked to the FOURTH person, looked at me and nodded, and then a boarding pass was issued. FINALLY -- I'm ready to go. I headed to the gate, fired up the wi-fi and did my Athens hostel booking.
To close out the ghetto-ness, the gate agent for the flight was the same woman behind the ticket counter, and the FOURTH person as well as another guy from the ticket office were the "ground crew." They schlepped bags and directed us up the stairs to the plane. Wow!
After this ordeal, I don't want to hear anyone complaining about American, United, US Airways, etc.!!
Are you surprised that the plane was less than half full?? At least there were no chicken coops or goats as I had expected...hehe
No comments:
Post a Comment